How women feel about themselves is a hot topic right now – and rightly so.  With both eating disorders and obesity on the increase, it’s pretty obvious that very few of us are even satisfied with how we look, let alone actually positively like or love ourselves.

This short video illustrates beautifully how women (and although there were none depicted, I’m pretty sure a lot of men too) find it incredibly hard to find anything that they like about themselves physically.  And yet, when asked to describe what they love about their friends bodies, it seems that we can always find something positive to say.

Whenever I work with clients who are struggling with poor body image, one thing I ask them to do at some point during their therapy is to write a list of all the things they love about themselves – not just physical things, but character traits and aspects of their personality as well.  I think it’s important to extend it beyond our looks, because we are so so much more than what we look like.

The vast majority struggle to come up with more than one or two things.

Then I ask them to write a list of how they think their friends would describe them, and what they like about them.  This list is always longer.  Maybe only by a few things, but it is longer.

At the end of therapy I get them to repeat the exercise.  The looks on their faces when they realise how much easier it is to write that first list (and how many more positive things they are able to identify about themselves) is wonderful, and it’s why I love what I do.  It may not change the world on a grand scale, but it helps to change that one person’s world, and that, for me, is all that’s important.

Why not have a go at doing this exercise, and see what you come up with?  I’d love to find out what happens, so please do feel free to leave a comment below describing what you discover.